for a moment i felt good.
and felt that i had the upper hand.

today my boss at fred called.
i thought she wanted me to come in to work today or tomorrow.
they already asked if i wanted to work on wed, which i turned down.
but anyway,
she didnt want me to work for her,
what actually had happened was that my old manager at ballard had called her and wanted to see if i could come in tonight and cashier for him.
well. not only did i want to spend my day at home, since i havent had a day off in a while,
but! those assholes fired me and didnt want me back.
and now theyre realizing what theyre missing out on.

the only good thing that i can think of coming out of this is now theres potential for manuel.
good luck to him.

also going along with work,
i am now having my weekend.
and yes. there is nothing to do,
and no one is home.
gay-reat!

wank says that he would rather have my job.
oh no! getting up to work at noon!
saying that you never really get used to getting up at 7 am every weekday.
well. try never having a set schedule.
tonight i closed.
got home at 11:30 pm.
tomorrow i will boot back to work getting up at 9 am to do so.
so you may get up ass early. but at least you have a huge amount of time to do whatever you wish to do in between shifts.
me.. i got less than 12. and most of that will require sleeping.
=P

anyone who doesnt have road rage definately does not drive enough to realize how many stupid people there actually are out there.

im kinda glad that i dont really have weekends,
cuz what time off that i do have, i dont do jack shit with it.
or maybe its just because no one else is home.
although meg and i did jack shit together for part of the day today ;)

i so coulda gone for a nap though. now its too late.
crabby and poopy.

are psychiatrists for people that dont have friends with the time to talk your problems out with?

seven attempts later, i was finally able to print my multicultural paper.
the ironic shit was that neither the lab nor media center could print my shit out.
i had to resort to the multicultural area.

dammit i'm tired today.
and i have a sweaty ass.

nothing much to report with about work.
things are pretty much becoming routine.
i'm learning a few names and making even fewer friends.
seems the mother-aged employees like to talk to me the most.
probably just they just generally like to talk the most, but whatever.

the highlight of the day was finding an old indian head penny in my till.
the fucker dates back to 1906 and is in pretty damn good shape for being traded around for just under a century.
the back is very basic. a wreath with a sheild at the top surrounding one cent.

but enough about that.
although i got nothing else.

oh. one thing.
i hate it when i try to joke with people at work (customers), and i dont realize til after i try, that they arent the joking type.
what a buzzkill.

shit.
i cant sleep and i have a longass day tomorrow.
class from 9 - 10:30, then work from noon to 8:30.
well. i guess its not even 12 hrs,
but i think i'll need some decent sleep to get through it.

words do not give thoughts justice.
-BWAAAAAAAAAAAH

so true.
it takes to many words to get one thought out.
sometimes i give up trying.
cuz... it makes sense in my head!
sometimes i think the few words that i send out to describe something just doesnt quite convey the whole message.
too much background and reasoning to fill the person in on.
its UNpossible!

well. that moth that i was bitching about the other day seemingly has a shitload of cousins at freds.
at night theres a row of lights along the side of the building.
all the moths decide to congregate here and do the same damn thing that i described in my previous post.
they'll fly up to the light, nose dive, hit the cement 20 ft below, then do their little "top" dance.
but the thing is.... we're talking about hundreds doing this!
and with numbers like that, its pretty impossible to walk around without stepping on or rolling over a few of these stupid bugs,
so when youre not hearing the smack on the pavement, you're seeing greenish black guts from one of the less lucky moths.
the ones that arent squished yet are doing their dance, or motionless, waiting to get stepped on.
stupid bugs.

dan thinks that the mosquito hawk is the stupidest insect around, and hey, i cant argue with that, but i think the moth is at least an honorable mention.
last night i had one in my room that would attempt to stick itself to the nipple on my light, seeing as how they have an ifiniti for it (light, not the nipple).
well, this thick-bodied moth wouldn't be able to hold his fatass up there, so on three different occasions, its retarded ass would simply drop to the floor with a loud thud.
now if it wasnt enough that it tried unsuccessfully to do it two other times, it also found its way over to my computer screen, where something went wrong and the fucking thing was spinning around on my desk on its head like a top thats almost at the end of its spins at a 45 degree angle. it did this for like a minute, in between its nose dives from the nipple, of course.

so annoyed by that, i turned off my light, and it eventually dissappeared into the darkness, and i decided to get some sleep.
this morning i wake awaken by the flapping of wings and the noise of attempted head-butting escape through the window.
the moth was trying to get outside to the light. its bad.
i think in between the curtain and the window will be its final resting place.
RIP, stupid mother fucker.

today was better, although i cashiered the whole day.
cheers to air for stopping by at the exact moment that i was clocking out for lunch!

yesterday was ass.
debit was down, meaning that anyone who had food stamps or a gift card needed to wait for an exorbitant amount of time while the checker would have to call up some stupid hotline, punch in a shitload of #'s to get a confirmation #.
by the end of the night, we ran out of the forms for the food stamps so we had to turn people away if they had no other form of payment (and who would, if the government would pay for their food?!).
so needless to say lines were backed up, and for about an hr, my job was to stand in U-scan and tell people that they couldnt use debit (beats cashiering though) cuz otherwise they would get a screen telling them to "please wait", that would have them wait until they figured out that something was wrong.
so when not doing that, i cashiered for the first half of the night, then got kicked out to do the boss' lunch. i wanted to parcel, but wasnt allowed to.
there wasnt a damn thing to do inside.... i guess i shouldnt complain.
by the end of the night i was doing all the shit the boss should have been doing.
heh. doing his job for my pay. heh. still shouldnt be complaining, although and extra buck or two an hr would be nice.
i think that if i wasnt in school i'd prefer being a boss there, but i think you need to devote a lot more time into it, and im just not willing.
i'd rather go to school, thanks.
anyway, more of this crap tonight.
debit should be up, so it wont be as bad.
yay.

shit.
so when im in school and have a job, i tend to not have a weekend.
and what i mean by this is that every damn day of the week i will either have school or work.
so for the summer i thought that i should make my own weekend.
well. i have wed and friday off every week (if fred sticks to that schedule).
but so far im bored as fuck cuz no one else is around.
hopefully fridays will make up for hump day.
although i work this friday, but that was a fluke cuz they thought that i needed to be in this class at work,
but i dont, so im just working for those hrs.
yay.

shit.
back to the days where i get off (work) at 11,
come home, do shit,
and then realize its 4am.
but it so doesnt feel like it cuz you were working just a few short hrs ago.


this will be my whole week. and weekend.
but it works well then. =D

in europe i noticed something that i thought to be ingenius and i wondered why it wasnt implemented here in the US.
the idea was a shopping cart that had 4 wheels that would have 360 degree revolving range.
around here the front two have this awesome power, but the back two are stationary at least in their rotary mobility.
but then today while i was out hunting for carts i realized the need for this impediment.
in europe those tiny ass carts never leave the store cuz people usually walk or take the bus... theres no room for parking.
but over here everyone drives, well, the majority, and when those carts get outside, theyre victim to all those dissimilarly sloped parking lots.
if they did have free range on all four wheels, they would have free range in the parking lot.
having only two wheels that have full motion inhibits the carts ability to easily drift away and into expensive things such as cars.
although, it still happens, and people bitch about it and blame the cartpushers.
what they dont realize is that its their own damn fault.
or at least their peers.
they carelessly abandon the carts when they have expended their use.
leave it where it lies.
sometimes this is on the peak of a slope, so with slight environmental changes, the fucker plunges full-speed at a car.
doh.
not our bad.
yet some people want to make a profit off of this and accuse the cart pushers of running at full speed and intentionally ramming the cart into the car.
oh what fun it is.
we just thought we'd never get caught!
....or something.
stupid ho.
remeniscent of that fat ho that got told "you better watch your attitude" by an old high school acquaintance.
and when she went to complain about it to my employers, told them that i told her that she "better watch her big fucking ass".
great.
luckily the insane ones are easily spotted.
just as this cart-rammed hag was.

i was thinking about this on my way home from school:
i got an email from the sleigh a couple days ago saying to maybe email or call her back.
(the biggest cop out ever [siht like that via email])
but i realized that the only reason i would go over to her place would be to see her little sister.
i enjoyed her company and compassion.
oh. a home cooked meal from her mom would be good too.
her mom is fucking martha stewart, but maybe even better cuz shes not hooked up on all that hoitey-toiety shit.
i mean seriously, who cares kosher salt in their kitchen? especially when theyre not jewish.

but yeah... thats all i came up with.

give credit where credit is due.
one time, in saint chapelle, this chapel in paris, france,
megan came up with an idea about religion.
i cant exactly remember what it was about, but she came up with it herself.
at the time i couldnt really see her point, and was somewhat of an ass about it,
but i figured it out, and it coincided with my views and i thought it to be pretty dead on.
but. as for my previous post,
that has nothing to do with saint chapelle or religion.
sorry to get you all riled up over nothing.

i cant sleep.
its been like this for the past couple of days.
probably since megan left.
but i just realized that i have some of the crazyiest ideas.
a lot of which are too crazy to write down.
people tend to not understand this craziness, but once its been supported,
then they look back to the person who initially proposed it.

im crazy. dont listen to me.
well... you'll never know, cuz i wont share.
HA!

(this is aimed at no one in particular)
[damn the necessity for these disclaimers]

took the long way home from downtown today after taking and acing the fucking retarded food handlers permit test.
found chinatown.
i didnt realize it was so big!
everything is covered in chinese lettering.
it was interesting and colorful.
dragons were everywhere!
i think im going back this weekend.
but... for school.

please at least read the first paragraph proceeding this one:

well. i read through this one book of the apocrypha, the arabic gospel of the infancy of our savior.
and even if you arent anywhere near interested in bible shit, you might like to read these verses.
of course the parts that i selected only show the outlandishness of what miracles were have said to have been preformed by jesus, and i assure you that there were some that would be deemed "good", but i picked these out just cuz they kinda go against the whole idea of, well... christianity.

have a look, if you will......

38. And Joseph used to go about through the whole city, and take the Lord Jesus with him, when people sent for him in the way of his trade to make for them doors, and milk-pails, and beds, and chests; and the Lord Jesus was with him wherever he went. As often, therefore, as Joseph had to make anything a cubit or a span longer or shorter, wider or narrower, the Lord Jesus stretched His hand towards it; and as soon as He did so, it became such as Joseph wished. Nor was it necessary for him to make anything with his own hand, for Joseph was not very skilful in carpentry.
(joseph sux. the only reason he was good was because of jesus fixing his fuck-ups)

40.And when the Lord Jesus answered that the sons of Israel were like the Ethiopians among the nations,
(anyone know what this means?)

46. Again, on another day, the Lord Jesus was with the boys at a stream of water, and they had again made little fish-ponds. And the Lord Jesus had made twelve sparrows, and had arranged them round His fish-pond, three on each side. And it was the Sabbath-day. Wherefore a Jew, the son of Hanan, coming up, and seeing them thus engaged, said in anger and great indignation: Do you make figures of clay on the Sabbath-day? And he ran quickly, and destroyed their fish-ponds. But when the Lord Jesus clapped His hands over the sparrows which He had made, they flew away chirping. Then the son of Hanan came up to the fish-pond of Jesus also, and kicked it with his shoes, and the water of it vanished away. And the Lord Jesus said to him: As that water has vanished away, so thy life shall likewise vanish away.
And immediately that boy dried up.
(this reminds me of something out of "clash of the titans" or whatever where the greek gods have that little arena where they make shit out of clay and it comes to life, etc.)
(i guess adolescents arent mature enough to control their killing powers. where were the parents?! out making shitty furniture, i suppose.)

47. At another time, when the Lord Jesus was returning home with Joseph in the evening. He met a boy, who ran up against Him with so much force that He fell. And the Lord Jesus said to him: As thou hast thrown me down, so thou shall fall and not rise again. And the same hour the boy fell down, and expired.
(jesus, the martyr and murderer.)

49. Thereafter they took Him to another and a more learned master, who, when be saw Him, said: Say Aleph. And when He had said Aleph, the master ordered him to pronounce Beth. And the Lord Jesus answered him, and said: First tell me the meaning of the letter Aleph, and then I shall pronounce Beth. And when the master hereupon raised his hand and flogged Him, immediately his hand dried up, and he died. Then said Joseph, to the Lady Mary: From this time we shall not let him go out of the house, since every one who opposes him is struck dead.
(if jesus can kill his teachers, can i?)

52. There was also among those philosophers one very skilled in treating of natural science, and he asked the Lord Jesus whether He had studied medicine. And He, in reply, explained to him physics and metaphysics, hyperphysics and hypophysics, the powers likewise and humours of the body, and the effects of the same; also the number of members and bones, of veins, arteries, and nerves; also the effect of heat and dryness, of cold and moisture, and what these give rise to; what was the operation of the soul upon the body, and its perceptions and powers; what was the operation of the faculty of speech, of anger, of desire; lastly, their conjunction and disjunction, and other things beyond the reach of any created intellect. Then that philosopher rose up, and adored the Lord Jesus, and said: O Lord, from this time I will be thy disciple and slave.
(uh, yeah. so why were people still ignorant about this shit til recently?)

first day o work today.
short day, slow day.
little rainy, but nothing much to complain about.

although, an interesting experience that i didnt realize til later.
hopefully this wont get me into trouble, but..
back when i first became fred's bitch, i worked with this chic who was 22 when i was 18.
i thought she was cool, and we hung out some, but i couldnt see why she wasnt into me.
well. a few years later, and now roles are reversed with me being 21 and this chic at work being 17.
theres quite a bit that happens to someone between those post-high school years.
i can see why she wasnt into me.
theres a lot of innocence and a basic lack of experiencing life lessons.

...i think.
dont get me wrong though, she seems like a cool chic.
just not my style.

uh....
mario, whut!!

yes!
i have a job!
now its just a matter of time before i start...
soon, please!
or...maybe after the 4th.

i stand corrected.
friends've got my back =)
silly me for doubting.

moby's test:
take 3 glasses of water.
in the first glass you put an orange slice.
in the second glass you put a baby carrot.
in the 3rd glass you put a tablespoon of ground beef.
which glasses of water would you be willing to drink?
just curious.

trav's test:
take 3 baked potatoes.
add......(see above)
...........................
which potato would you be willing to eat?


i love being devil's advocate.

it seems that guys that are friends try to work against you when it comes to chix.
i now know of 2, if not 3, guys who give advice against me.

thanks guys.

i wish school would allow you to do your own thing and research into your own tangents.
cuz. i dont really care how jews became white.
but im all about that apocrypha shit.

been a while since this shits been running.
no. that growth aint no goiter.

thanks for (not) humoring my crazy ass.
i guess i still didnt answer my question, but at least i confirmed its exsistence.
maybe now i can get some sleep....

maybe protestants cut this shit out cuz it just bes whack:

He has said that Jesus spoke, and, indeed, when He was lying in His cradle said to Mary His mother: I am Jesus, the Son of God, the Logos, whom thou hast brought forth, as the Angel Gabriel announced to thee; and my Father has sent me for the salvation of the world.

popped out and speaking his very first words all before hes at least 40 days old.
wanna read the rest?

did manaesseh first come up with the disciples prayer?
then matthew jacked it for his gospel and got all the credit?
check out the bottom.
compare it with this:

OUR Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in EARTH, as it is in heaven.
Give US this day OUR daily bread. And forgive US OUR debts, as WE forgive OUR debtors.
And lead US not into temptation, but deliver US from evil:
For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen." Matthew 6:9-13

plagarism!

solomon gets shit deleted cuz he mentions "hades"?
the greek/roman hell.

my bad.
they made a childrens story less horrific by deleting some psalms?
david and goliath.

basically anyone using the bible to prove a point uses it out of context.
gay.

if you hate bible shit, dont read.

venturing in egypt and abroad, art and the inhabitants drew my attention to a story that concerns big baby deezus.
they say that when he was born, the king ordered a slaughter of all the children of ages 2 and younger killed: the slaughter of the innocents.
so according to egypt and art of the renissance, big baby deezus and fam cruised on over to egypt and went into hiding.

now.

if you know anything about the bible. at least in its state that we have it today, you will know that there is really no mention of this passing in the bible.
i'm looking around to see if there actually is, but so far to no avail:

The Holy Family in Egypt

The advent of the Holy Family to Egypt, seeking refuge, is an event of the utmost significance in our dear country's long, long history.

Moved by the spirit of prophecy, Hosea foresaw the flight from Bethlehem where there was no safe place forth Christ Child to lay his head, and the eventual return of the holy refugees from Their sanctuary in Egypt, where Jesus had found a place in the hearts of the Gentiles, when he uttered God's words: "Out of Egypt have I called My SON ". (Hosea 11: 1)

this is from some shitty website.
on further inspection, reading hosea 11:1
you see this shit is taken out of context:

11 When Israel was a child, I loved him,
and out of Egypt I called my son.
2 The more Ia called them,
the more they went from me;b
they kept sacrificing to the Baals,
and offering incense to idols.

hosea isnt even talking about jesus, hes talking about jacob, who is often times referred to as "israel"

so my next step is to search out and see if theres anything on this "apocrypha" which both the new and old testament have.
theyre basically books that arent credited to belong to what is already in the bible.
the new apocrypha, no one accepts (the catholics accept the old one. ive read the first two of maccabees back in the day, but couldnt really tell you what it was about). this new testament apocrypha has allegedly (i havent read any of it) stories of little baby deezus' childhood.
from about the visitation of the wisemen to about where he turns water into wine.
maybe the politics of the time wanted to exclude anything that conicided with making muslims look like decent people (harboring the holy family).
so. possibly political people in charge set out to whipe this story/history clean from how the people viewed their religion.basically omitting the whole damn thing.
now. i dont know this to be the truth, its merely my hypothesis, but seriously. where the fuck did all of jesus' young life go? they have shit from 6000 years ago but they miss a little blurb in the person that basically makes their whole book?
yeh.. likely.

research ensues.
(sorry if my writing is a bit jumbled.)