the blog alliance should be reduced to 4.
thats all i gotta say about that.
ok maybe not.
all you bastards out there who have blogs yet only enjoy reading others =P
if you dont do either (read or blog) then thats cool. but still sux that i go to them and its still the same fucking post from a week ago, or at least the weekend.

neways.
kick ball = badassticles. takes one back to fucking elementary school, where pitching was a science, and everyone knew when to back up or scoot forward. yes. good times.

i got me a fucking desk and chair to fill the void in my magnaminous room (dont ask me what that means, if anything). now i wont feel guilty for taking it and being such an ass to jay. i saw that guy at the party. i guess theres no real hard feelings. although the man owes me $70 still =P
but yeah. i put together my chair, but im kinda ify on the desk. i cracked open the box, but i dont know if i want to tackle it right now. im kinda worn out from all that kuh-razy kick ballin. yes, its been a while since ive excersized.

im getting into this stage, where i see shit, i like it, and i buy it. im still really reserved, but im kinda coming out of that. is that good or bad? i wonder. maybe its just a passing phase. i dont think i'll be going out immediately and replacing my little shit box of a computer though. but thank god i dont have to sit on the fucking ground at my doorframe with my laptop on a damn stool and a stack of 50some mouse pads for my ghetto mouse, so its not totally ackward.

another part of my life everyones bored of: maegan actually initiated an AIM conversation with me a couple days ago. i told her how she stood me up, and she apologized, but that she just had so much other shit goin on. yeah. well how much time does it take to call and say "i cant make it".... huh?
also. i asked about ashleigh, if she'd talked to her since her move. maegan took that as me not yet over her. wtf? asking about her well-being is a sure-fire way to know im still stuck on her.... does she forget that during the time that we were together that she was deathly ill? what the fuck ever. im tired of it all. ashleighs too fucking stubborn. and maegan cant see my side.

but i did come to a realization: ok. so right now, im at this semi-stableness with ashleigh. (ok, this worked better in my head, try to stay with me though) but we're kinda steady, like theres still shit to be worked out, but things are ok. if contact was initiated then chaos would just to an all time high. smoothing out would be possible, to get back to stability, but it would take a lot. so overall stability might be better with contact, but would fuck things up more and create more complication, so why not just keep things at a shaky, but steady stable? ok.... so it would be better if i had a graph to show... itd be something like that outta thermodynamics, like with the enzymes and shit... yeah. and it would also help if there was a better word than stability, but i dont know what that is.

anyone that understood that, i bow to you.
but now, i gots me a desk to assemble.