fall in

hm. maybe its time for a something a bit lighter.

i was working at the pool thursday. the usual shift. all the same kids...
i play with the last kid at 8ish after he's done with his 7:30 lesson. we grab a bouncy ball and kick or throw it back and forth on the pool deck. occasionally, as the pool deck isn't all that wide, maybe 2o feet, the ball bounces off a wall or just makes a straight-shot into the water. sometimes its within reach, other times a noodle is necessary to extend one's reach about 3 feet, and then there's times where poor little marcus, the kid i'm playing with, has to jump in after it.

about ten minutes in, we'd had all of the above situations. then came a sharp sliced kick which bounced to the edge of the pool. about a foot and a half or two feet out which didn't so much require a noodle to grab the ball. so i squat down, legs wide, chest horizontal to the ground, when i feel this slight push on my ass.
that's all it takes.
THAT LITTLE BASTARD!
reaching for the ball for him, he pushes me in.
in the few seconds that i have to think about it, i'm think, "ok, what items of clothing can i salvage from getting wet. shirt, no. shorts, definately NO.
HAT! yes, HAT!
so as i'm going head-first i grab the bill and send the hat flying as hard as i could. in what direction, i know not which.
in salvaging the the hat, i put my body in harm's way. i fell into 3' of water. normally i know how to take a fall. i've watched enough wrestling to know that the best way to land is on the meaty part of your shoulders with your head up.
there wasn't enough time for that, so i hit the pool bottom with the top of my left shoulder. the things i do for that damned hat. so. a battle wound. i guess no big deal.

the best part was immediately jumping up out of the water to see my hat sitting right at the edge of the pool unscathed/wettened. and we're talking right there, in the part that the overflow drains, mere inches.
but i can't be that lucky can i?
of course not.
this friendly iranian woman that i greet and do my pool boy duties of moving her shit around for her convenience (i get bored as fuck) tries to, for once return the favor. she goes, "oH! here's your hat!" and promptly throws it in the water at me. the only problem... it's a short throw. so it lands in the water. crap.
but i save it before it totally submerges, so only half of it is wet. i forcefully thank her for her stupid move and throw it back onto the pool deck along with my soaked shirt.
but that little rapscallion marcus goes at it again. he picks up my hat, repeats what the iranian woman had said, "oH! here's your hat!" and throws it back in the water, again out of my reach. this time... fully capsized.
fuck. the one time i actually pull a badass move off on purpose and it goes to pot. i'm left with a sopping hat and shirt.

i put them in the dry sauna to dry. it actually did pretty well on my hat, but only got about a third of my shirt dry. i had to forever keep an eye on them though because the weird-as-fuck swim instructor and iranian woman's "in-pool boyfriend" likes to take clothes that he well knows aren't his and wear them the next day. he did it to my swim shorts a couple weeks ago. i guess he likes the feel of my ball presence up against his. like i said... sick fuck.
if i didn't need those shorts i would have burned them. but in this case, washing subdued my urge to barf.

so there you have it. an athletic feat gone unnoticed and unrewarded. and all i got to show for it is a bruised shoulder. but its ok. i threw in that kid enough times to make up for it. i even carried him at my side like a football and charged into the water. that'll learn him. k maybe not, he enjoyed it.
it's all good. kids aren't that bad. unless they're yours.